Friends living in China have been difficult to return in the United States

In 2015, a one-year-old business agreement from Shanghai from Chicago, an overwhelmed clad and 20 more than 20 boxes of 20 boxes. It was not the most conventional way to come to a country where I will never put up.

But after taking their eyes in Israel and Argentina, I saw myself as a “global citizen” that I will settle in a few weeks. SPOILER: I was excessively extreme.

The lesson came fast: does not bend the Chinese will. Instead, it is learning to adapt to change one’s rhythm to the customs of this extensive nation. The answer to the most questions is simply “because China” was.

In Shanghai, we have moved to a high-rise “maze” in Shanghai, a population of my husband’s homeland. Over the years, in months I learned to wait for hot tea in restaurants and washed every face washed when washing the skin, shocked when the skin causes whitening substances.

This external culture has been used in moments of a large number of frustration because I try to walk.

Culture shock, both ways

During my first years in China, I lived in local, local, but slowly for rare moments because the Chinese improved. Again, the children’s points to me and shouted: “Look, mother, Laowai!” A foreigner.

Although I visited the Chinese signs, I watched soap operas, learned pop cultural references or writing Chinese characters, I will be a Laowai forever.

On my last visit to the United States, I took part in one of my most spellings: Minnesota State Exhibition: Minnesota State Exhibition – Annual Ritual for Midwesterner, myself is full of prosperity with myself, fireworks and most importantly, sugar and fried.

I took the rows of American flags, photos. It was similar to what I felt in China in China – the mouth of the inverted cultural shock. I have no longer contacted football, beer shell, farm-friendly relative.

Again, I found myself a foreigner, but this time in a familiar country.

Friends feel like aliens

My definition of the house has developed over the years and my daily experiences changed next to him.

To treat the traditional Chinese medicine to treat any diseases, like drinking hot water – like acupuncture and Chinese herbs, my values ​​and beliefs in Western treatment have never changed.

I will never be completely fully in Chinese culture because I will never be able to adapt to the meal of the American.

This sense of alienation is a common topic for many expatriate. This bitter realization: The more you fit into a new culture, you connect with your roots.

Living abroad, I received a white picket fence for the freedom of the dream of a house with 2.4 kids and a white picket fence for the freedom of retirement – to travel in the whims to the remote-visible islands throughout Asia.

Because the world is becoming increasingly culture, the sense of meaning and touching the feeling often leads to resonance. From a technical point of view, I am not a “third culture” – a period developed by Sociologist Rut Hill Hill Astem, referring to those who exercise their parents outside the home country, I find the “third culture mature”.

I mix the elements of the American education, creating a different liquid identity, not fully compatible with traditional categories.

I struggle with friends and family to return home – do not understand the top flow of Tibetan Autonomous Region or my fixing in black sesame desserts. All the experience of updating their bathroom, because they all sound out foreign, feel foreign to me for the settlement.

My search for affiliation

Now I learned to hug the “Chinese moments” arising with a sense of humor and humility.

In China, it was called Laowai in my first years, the name of my other. Now I’m dressing him as an honorary sign, my journey and not grow.

As I looked, it is not just about navigating the complexity of being a foreigner in another country, but also to reconcile with my origin. Perhaps I’m completely intended to find comfort in the gaps between the cultures.

I hug my life in Shanghai and the challenges.

Do you have a story to share about moving to a city in Asia? Contact the Editor akarplus@businessinsider.com.